Marriage is funny. Being a housewife is funnier.
I never planned to be a housewife. In fact, it was the exact opposite of what I wanted to be. I always thought that I would be able to carry my own, even in a marriage. That's what I wanted. Miss Independent down to the bone. However, after being laid off in November, and my temp job ending just two weeks ago, I found myself at home cooking, cleaning, and job hunting all day. I had no reason to leave the house except for a quick trip to the store to pick up a couple of items to help finish dinner off. In fact, one week I hadn't left the house in so long that my eyes started burning when I finally stepped out to go get a diet coke!
Anyway, I digress. The point of this entry is that...I lost myself. With having nowhere to go, I didn't find it necessary to get "dressed". Sure I would wear a t-shirt around the house, but everything else had gone south. Hair wrapped up in a scarf, aforementioned t-shirt on, dry face (no makeup what-so-ever, not even gloss!), and flip flops. That's what I wore on a daily. Then today I took a look at myself, and saw that I was pathetic! Is it possible that I am the same young lady who was all glamoured up just 6 weeks for my wedding? What happened to that girl?
I felt stuck already. A housewife for two weeks, and I feel stuck. Today I woke myself up and reassured myself that this is not my role. This is not what I'm going to do with my life for the rest of my life. This is just a momentary pit stop until God blesses me with my next gig. In the meantime, I couldn't and cannot let myself fall to pieces.
With that said, I got up, took a shower, and then sat down in front of my makeup kits. I decided I wanted a fun, soft, sweet, candy look, something that would really make J notice, without me looking like I was about to go out for a night on the town. Pinks are my friend. I found all of the pink eyeshadows that I had, pink blush, and pink gloss, and got to work. I was so friggin pink I chuckled to myself, I was having so much fun! Then I let my hair down, put on a down to earth, but cute shirt and some jeans, sprayed some vera wang perfume on my neck and wrists and folded clothes until the husband came home.
I was so happy I did. He kept saying how good I looked, and then, it was a wrap.
That was lesson number one early in this marriage for me. No letting myself go! I'm not saying I'm going to do this every day, but I'm aiming for atleast every other day. J appreciated it, and you know what? So did I! It seriously boosted my confidence, and reminded me who I am. Ain't nothin wrong with that :~)