As you all know, as of June 20, 2009 I will be a Mrs. and I am getting pretty excited! Since becoming engaged, I have spent most of my days living and breathing on theknot.com. It.is.fab. All of the cake ideas, decor, drinks, and conversation! Yes! Conversation! If you didn't know, theknot has a forum community, and you can visit as many as you please. I, for one, am addicted to three in particular: The DC area forum, the Making It Personal aka DIY board, and of course, the elustrious African American Weddings board. I love it! I finally found a community of African American brides that isn't catty, and where they have your back no matter what. I don't interact as much as I would like to, but I sure do read as many posts as I can fit into a 24hr day.
Ever so often someone will speak up about how their family is against them doing this thing or the other in their wedding. They get fed up, tired, wondering if they can just receive support without all the blah blah blah from family and/or friends. They find they have to keep their wedding plans between them and their fiance's. In a way, this is how the AAW board on theknot becomes our extended family. It's there that we can go to talk about nothing but OUR special day all.day.long. We don't have to worry about our bff maryjoe wanting us to shut-da-hell-up-about-the-gotdarn-wedding-already! Or grandma giving us the side eye for not sticking with tradition. It is here that we can come together formulating ideas of how to jump over this obstacle, or create this decor setup so that it says Ka-pow! Diva! When the guests walk in. Or where we can read about how so and so was blessed by this person or another because they helped them out with the burden of the cost it takes to plan a wedding, or simply because their fiance supported them. We look and go hmmm, if it happened to her, surely God has not foresaken me! And before you know it, their blessing has blessed us, then we are able to see God move in our own lives.
Today though, I realized I am even more blessed than that. I don't have those annoying relatives or friends that some of the women seem to have. Everyone seems to support me and my vision, even though they don't know what it is. Because it's mine, they trust it. Even though my mom has rolled her eyes at some of the non-traditional stuff I'm doing (what do you MEAN you are laying the aisle runner down the night before??? No one is suppose to walk on the aisle runner but you!!!), she abruptly stops herself and remembers that this is my wedding, and I should be able to do with it as I please. For a moment in time I wanted to pull every single one of my cousins hairs out one-by-one because she was asking the most annoying questions (why ivory instead of white???). At times, because planning a wedding is so overwhelming, it was enough for me to want to smack a bytch! but then I remembered that she was pregnant, and I have no idea what it's like to have your hormones all over the place like that. So I sat on my hands, and tried my best to keep my mouth shut. Today, she is as cool as ever, and for that, I'm greatful.
Even Mr. Habibty, the love of my life, has come to grips with the fact that this wedding will be something he nor his family has ever seen before, and he is ok with that. Everyone has my back. Everyone just wants to make sure that I'm ok, that I have everything I need to make this day as exciting and beautiful as I imagine it. I am blessed! My family is not stressing me out, but instead they are holding my hand. Maybe I haven't told them thank you enough, but it is today that I see the huge blessing in that. My family and friends really are the angels in my life that so many other people pray for. I definitely see the God in them, and that is awesome!
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